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Dear future husband,
epic-humor: When you propose to me, please don’t put the ring in my food because I guarantee I will eat that shit. Follow this blog, you’ll love it on your dashboard!
Meeting my favorite band member
Me: Will you sign this?
Them: Wait,what is that?
Me: A marriage certificate
Them: But.. I..
Me: TOO LATE, YOU SIGNED IT
I was walking around in a Target store, when I saw...
Band member: Hi, nice to meet you!
Me: I can't believe I'm actually talking to you, and breathing the same air! Oh my gosh, I'll never wash these lungs again. sldkjfhglkjdf
Band member: *laughs*
Band member: So do you want me to sign something?
Me: Let's make beautiful babies.
Band member: What?
Me: I asked if you could sign my.... poster.
Band member: I could have sworn you just said -
Band member: But -
That awkward moment when someone can't pronounce...
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